When my oldest son decided he wanted to attend The Citadel, little did I know I’d find my calling too.
During Corps Day weekend, March 16 – 18, I had the opportunity to meet parents that I’ve only corresponded with on Facebook or through this blog. A few wondered how I came to write the blog. The simple answer is, I learned a lot the past 4 years and if I can help someone else through the process I’m happy to do so.
I don’t pretend for a minute to have all the answers. Any number of parents of a current cadets and graduates can answer most of the questions that I’m asked.
Sometimes in life you find yourself in a unique position to help others. I believe God is using my background in public relations, chaplaincy and interfaith dialogue, to be a caring presence for the parents of cadets.
Corps Day Weekend 2012 for me was about visiting friends and paying forward the kindness that was extended to my son during his four years at The Citadel. So many families hosted him for meals and visits. They helped in ways I’m sure I am not even aware of. Since my friends couldn’t join me for the weekend for a reunion I decided I go anyway and try to pass along a few kindnesses.
After a full morning of visiting the barracks, the band concert, watching the 2013 Summerall Guards then the parade, I was ready to go to lunch. I had made plans to meet a Georgia cadet at 5th Battalion. After four years of waiting outside 1st Battalion for our cadet this was a whole new experience. 5th Battalion, or Stevens Barracks, is home to Palmetto Battery, Papa Company and Sierra Company. Several Georgia cadets are in each company so I could visit with their parents and meet new friends. At one point the knobs of Palmetto Battery were marched into the barracks. Several minutes later they ran out in the PT (physical training uniform) to return later pulling the canons used for the parades. It is a ritual that happens every day after a parade, but one I had never seen before. I recognized a few of the knobs as the ones I met earlier at the band concert dressed in the various uniforms from previous conflicts. I hope their parents will see the photos I took of their cadets in those uniforms.
My young cadet friend, Cadet Lee, emerged from the barracks in his dress white uniform. It is a favorite uniform among parents. The cadets tell me they prefer it over the wool ones as well. After touching base with my friend, Jerri, we headed to The Marina Variety Store for lunch. I’ve mentioned this restaurant before. It sits right on the Ashley River off of Lockwood Blvd. I like it there because you can park for free, the food is great the staff is nice and the view is great. Our time over lunch flew by as we heard stories from Cadet Lee and Jerri’s son, Cadet Rodgers, two very sharp young men.
One of the highlights of my weekend came after dropping off Cadet Lee. On the way off of campus I saw two knobs looking like they might need a ride. I introduced myself as the mom of a graduate and asked if I could help. They were very polite but said they had to go a distance to their home and a cab was on the way. The real fun began when i asked what company they are in. They replied. “Bravo Ma’am.” I then told them my son, Nelson Lalli was in Bravo Company. They looked at each other than looked at me in disbelief. They said they knew of “Mr. Lalli” and that he is a legend in Bravo Company. With that I told them to cancel the cab, I would take them to their home. The 20 minute ride was filled with knob stories and them telling me what they had heard about my son. They also spoke about the current cadet command of Bravo Company most of whom I have known since their knob year. I smiled as they referred to each one as Mr. The two knobs seemed to be making the best of their first year. We laughed as we exchanged stories. I made a note to myself to try and keep up with these two young cadets as they progress in their time at The Citadel.
I spent a little time walking along the beach on Isle of Palms that afternoon. My next stop was the Boating Center on the campus. It is one of my favorite spots on campus to visit. The contrast of the tranquility of the dock and marsh compared to the intense environment of the rest of the campus is striking.
My next fun pay it forward moment came as I was leaving campus. I saw a group of cadets outside 2nd Battalion. It looked like they were arranging for a ride off campus. When I stopped and go tout of the car I realized I knew one of them. I ended up driving 5 cadets to downtown Charleston in my little Toyota Corolla. The ride was fun as I met the 4 cadets who were with my friend Wei-Ming. All five of them are from Taiwan and will go back into service with a branch of the Taiwanese military after graduation.
My last morning was spent sharing brunch with another Georgia cadet. The same cadet I brought a care package to Saturday morning. We had corresponded via Facebook last summer as he prepared to report, but had not really spent any time talking. It was fun to hear of his plans for the future and to learn about how his first year was progressing. Spring break is coming up and shortly after that will be Recognition Day. I could hear the excitement in his voice as he talked about Recognition Day.
The weekend ended with my traditional last stop at Mark Clark Hall and a spin through the Gift shop. I was stopped by two families in town to look at the school for their high school student. They had a few questions for a parent. As I spoke to each family I was reminded of our first visit to campus the summer of 2006.
Each cadet has their own path at The Citadel. Each family will develop their own rituals when they visit. I am grateful for the many families who hosted our son during his time there. I hope on future visits I’ll be able to continue to pay the kindness our son received during his time at the school forward to current cadets.
Corps Day Weekend 2012 for me was about visiting friends and paying forward the kindness that was extended to my son during his four years at The Citadel. So many families hosted him for meals and visits. They helped in ways I’m sure I am not even aware of. Since my friends couldn’t join me for the weekend for a reunion I decided I go anyway and try to pass along a few kindnesses.
After a full morning of visiting the barracks, the band concert, watching the 2013 Summerall Guards then the parade, I was ready to go to lunch. I had made plans to meet a Georgia cadet at 5th Battalion. After four years of waiting outside 1st Battalion for our cadet this was a whole new experience. 5th Battalion, or Stevens Barracks, is home to Palmetto Battery, Papa Company and Sierra Company. Several Georgia cadets are in each company so I could visit with their parents and meet new friends. At one point the knobs of Palmetto Battery were marched into the barracks. Several minutes later they ran out in the PT (physical training uniform) to return later pulling the canons used for the parades. It is a ritual that happens every day after a parade, but one I had never seen before. I recognized a few of the knobs as the ones I met earlier at the band concert dressed in the various uniforms from previous conflicts. I hope their parents will see the photos I took of their cadets in those uniforms.
My young cadet friend, Cadet Lee, emerged from the barracks in his dress white uniform. It is a favorite uniform among parents. The cadets tell me they prefer it over the wool ones as well. After touching base with my friend, Jerri, we headed to The Marina Variety Store for lunch. I’ve mentioned this restaurant before. It sits right on the Ashley River off of Lockwood Blvd. I like it there because you can park for free, the food is great the staff is nice and the view is great. Our time over lunch flew by as we heard stories from Cadet Lee and Jerri’s son, Cadet Rodgers, two very sharp young men.
One of the highlights of my weekend came after dropping off Cadet Lee. On the way off of campus I saw two knobs looking like they might need a ride. I introduced myself as the mom of a graduate and asked if I could help. They were very polite but said they had to go a distance to their home and a cab was on the way. The real fun began when i asked what company they are in. They replied. “Bravo Ma’am.” I then told them my son, Nelson Lalli was in Bravo Company. They looked at each other than looked at me in disbelief. They said they knew of “Mr. Lalli” and that he is a legend in Bravo Company. With that I told them to cancel the cab, I would take them to their home. The 20 minute ride was filled with knob stories and them telling me what they had heard about my son. They also spoke about the current cadet command of Bravo Company most of whom I have known since their knob year. I smiled as they referred to each one as Mr. The two knobs seemed to be making the best of their first year. We laughed as we exchanged stories. I made a note to myself to try and keep up with these two young cadets as they progress in their time at The Citadel.
I spent a little time walking along the beach on Isle of Palms that afternoon. My next stop was the Boating Center on the campus. It is one of my favorite spots on campus to visit. The contrast of the tranquility of the dock and marsh compared to the intense environment of the rest of the campus is striking.
My next fun pay it forward moment came as I was leaving campus. I saw a group of cadets outside 2nd Battalion. It looked like they were arranging for a ride off campus. When I stopped and go tout of the car I realized I knew one of them. I ended up driving 5 cadets to downtown Charleston in my little Toyota Corolla. The ride was fun as I met the 4 cadets who were with my friend Wei-Ming. All five of them are from Taiwan and will go back into service with a branch of the Taiwanese military after graduation.
My last morning was spent sharing brunch with another Georgia cadet. The same cadet I brought a care package to Saturday morning. We had corresponded via Facebook last summer as he prepared to report, but had not really spent any time talking. It was fun to hear of his plans for the future and to learn about how his first year was progressing. Spring break is coming up and shortly after that will be Recognition Day. I could hear the excitement in his voice as he talked about Recognition Day.
The weekend ended with my traditional last stop at Mark Clark Hall and a spin through the Gift shop. I was stopped by two families in town to look at the school for their high school student. They had a few questions for a parent. As I spoke to each family I was reminded of our first visit to campus the summer of 2006.
Each cadet has their own path at The Citadel. Each family will develop their own rituals when they visit. I am grateful for the many families who hosted our son during his time there. I hope on future visits I’ll be able to continue to pay the kindness our son received during his time at the school forward to current cadets.
I traveled to Charleston for what was originally going to be a little reunion with a couple of the Citadel Ya Ya friends. Due to work responsibilities both mom’s had to cancel, but I went anyway. I am so glad I did! I had a fun weekend of catching up with current parents and cadets. Plus it was a gorgeous weekend.
My tradition the past four years when we had a cadet in school at The Citadel continued this weekend. The first stop is Mark Clark Hall for a rest break and a trip through the Gift Shop. Unlike the past four years I didn’t call my cadet to let him know we arrived safely. I began my visits with staff on campus with a trip to the Army ROTC office then the commandants office just to say hello and catch them up on how our new second lieutenant is doing.
The next stop was to Deas Hall to see Susie Maghakian the staff person who handles donations to The Citadel Heroes Project. Along the way I ran into two Citadel Family Association volunteers and friends. The next mailing to deployed cadets and graduates is coming up and I wanted to make a financial donation to help with the cost of the mailing. If you’d like to send in a donation see this link.
I wasn’t sure what it would be like to visit the campus on my own with no particular schedule. It turned out to be a really fun weekend with a few pleasant surprises along the way. Before the Friday parade I stopped by 1st Battalion to see who I might run into from Bravo Company. It was so fun to catch up with the parents of current seniors and other families I’ve some to know.
I shared dinner with two senior cadets from Delta Company. It was such a treat to go into two with these two bright young women. The dinner conversation was very different, in a good way, with women cadets rather than a group of guys. After parking along Church Street we walked to the Charleston Crab House for a delicious dinner and a few fun photos.
Saturday of Corps Day the barracks are open to families and friends. Before the trip I arranged to meet a first year knob from Georgia to deliver a care package to the barracks. During Open Barracks family and friends can bring in food and supplies without any problem of raising the awareness of the cadre.
The next stop was the parade field to secure a good spot to watch the Summerall Guards exchange rifles. My son, a member of the 2011 Summerall Guards, passed his rifle to a fellow cadet in Bravo Company. This year that senior cadet passed the same rifle to another Bravo cadet. It is a very moving ceremony. I wanted to be sure to take photos so my son could see his friends with the rifle they each can now claim. I also took a lot of photos of another Bravo cadet from Texas. His parents couldn’t be there so I stood in and took photos for them.
I checked YouTube this morning to see if the videos have started to appear. As of this writing I found two videos of the 2013 Summerall Guards. One is very short of the 2012 and 2013 Summerall Guards starting out on their battalion run. The second is a little shaky of the first performance of the 2013 Summerall Guards. As I met parents of the 2013 Summerall Guards I encouraged them to exchange email addresses with each other to make sharing information, photos and videos easier throughout the next year. Throughout the performance I took lots of photos.
Between the ceremony and the Saturday parade I caught up with a dear friend , fellow Georgia Citadel parent and Army wife, Jerri Rodgers. Her son is in the Regimental Band and Pipes. The Corps Day performance is a tribute to soldiers from throughout our history. As a selection is played a cadet dressed in a period uniform steps forward. All was going just fine until they reached the current conflicts in Iraq and Afghanistan. The music was beautiful, but when the cadet stepped forward wearing uniforms my son is wearing now. A lump formed in my throat. Jerri must have sensed my emotions because she reached over and took my hand. The tears started rolling down my cheeks before I could pull myself together. In a few short month my second lieutenant will be in Afghanistan. While I can talk about his deployment and not become emotional, the sound of the band playing a solemn song coupled with two cadets in Army uniforms brought on emotions I must be keeping deep inside.
I pulled myself together and prepared to watch the second parade of the weekend. I took even more photos and caught up with more friends, including graduates who were in town to visit too.
The afternoon and evening were also a lot of fun, but I’ll save those stories for the next entry.
A year or so ago I posted this question on Facebook,”What is your favorite Charleston restaurant.” A wide variety of friends chimed in with their favorites.
Like everything else, if you ask 5 different people this question you will get 5 different answers. To get the conversation started here I’ll list some of our favorite places to visit when we are in town.
Marina Variety Store Restaurant This restaurant is near the campus, right on Lockwood Blvd. They serve breakfast, lunch, and dinner. They have a terrific menu, and is right on the river at the Charleston Marina. Great food at a good price and it is a casual restaurant. We eat here for Sunday brunch before driving home.
The Wreck Right on the river off of Shem creek. Extremely casual, with paper table clothes and plastic utensils. The food is off the boat fresh. Check their operating hours and get there right when they open.
Virginia’s On King – Not far from Marion Square, Very good Southern cooking.
Jestine”s Kitchen – a traditional spot for tourists to visit. The food is good, but expect a wait.
Charleston Crab House on James Island – Great location with none of the parking hassles of downtown Charleston. The food is consistently good. We went here with 30 people on Ring Weekend.
Tommy Condon’s– A Irish pub with good food and atmosphere.
Sticky Fingers – A great place for barbecue and wings. Several locations.
Melvin’s – Not too far from campus terrific barbecue.
West Ashley Crab Shack – across the river from The Citadel campus. We’ve never had to wait for a table and have enjoyed all the meals we’ve eaten here. A good place to go for seafood without the parking hassle and crowds of in town.
Hominy Grill – An award-winning restaurant. We ate brunch here the Friday of Ring Weekend. The restaurant is close to campus.
Ye Old Fashioned Ice Cream & Sandwich Cafe – We stop at the location just over the bridge from The Citadel once each visit. The ice cream is great, but the sandwiches and salads are too.
Poe’s Tavern On Sullivan’s Island. A great pub with terrific burgers and sandwiches.
For a good listing of Charleston area restaurants visit the Charleston Area Convention and Visitors Bureau “Where to Dine” web site. A number of websites give reviews on area restaurant’s. Fodor’s is just one I check.
Please leave your tips in the comment section of this entry.
My son’s knob year I looked at hotels.com to find an affordable hotel in the Charleston area for Matriculation Day and Parents Weekend. I had never been to Charleston and didn’t know the area. We were budget conscious, but at the same time we didn’t want to stay in a bad area of town. The first few visits we stayed at properties that were a little higher in price, but were also well-known chains.
After talking with other parents on our visits I picked up a few tips. If I had this information earlier we could have saved a good bit of money. Learning this one tip took me from the decent AAA discounts to the DEEP discounts I enjoyed for the final 3 years.
A very industrious hotel general manager found our Facebook group for Georgia Parents several years ago and offered us a special rate at the Hawthorn Suites, a great property about 7 miles from campus that offers a 2 room suite with kitchen facilities, an indoor pool, and a full breakfast in the lobby each morning. They still offer discounts to all Citadel families if you call the hotel directly in advance and rooms are available.
Every hotel I’ve stayed in: the Embassy Suites in North Charleston, Best Western Charleston Downtown, SpringHill Suites Charleston, LaQuinta Inn & Suites Charleston Riverview, and the Courtyard Charleston Marriott, and the Hampton Inn & Suites Charleston/West Ashley, have laundry facilities for your cadet to use while off campus visiting with you. Be sure to have plenty of quarters and your own detergent.
A few families with RV’s have found camp grounds in the area they like to frequent. A number of families like to rent homes or condos by the beach when they visit. VRBO.com is a good place to start to find a rental property.
If you have tips, or a favorite hotel or rental company you like to through, please leave a note in the comments section of this entry.
(unless of course you want to keep your special place a secret)
I listened the other day as a young mom called after her son to, “WALK PLEASE!”
In that instant I was brought back to a time when my boys were 4 and 6 years old. I was convinced I’d go to my grave yelling Walk! If there was a puddle in an acre of land, my two sons were in the middle of it.
Years later, when my oldest son decided to apply for an Army ROTC scholarship, and to attend The Citadel, I reminded myself of these two mud covered boys and the times when they would play soldier.
It won’t be long until your senior cadet will be graduating. The cadets wait four years for this weekend, then spend the rest of their lives wishing they could return.
In some cases the cadets will be commissioned into a branch of the military, graduate and report for duty. Other cadets will graduate and begin their careers in the business world or go on to graduate school.
The events of commencement weekend begin on Thursday with an awards ceremony and the baccalaureate service. The Star of the West competition is also held Thursday.
The commissioning services are held Friday morning. The Army usually goes first. Check with your cadet and/or the ROTC office if you have questions about the ceremony.We were told to arrive an hour early to secure the best seat. Two family members may pin the bars on the new lieutenant and may sit with him or her. The rest of the family and friends sit behind them. After the ceremony in the chapel the lieutenants go out to the parade field to receive their first salute from a non-commissioned officer (NCO). It is customary for the new officer to give the NCO a silver dollar at this time.
We gave our cadet a Lifetime Membership in the Citadel Alumni Association. All new Lifetime members and up to 3 other guests may attend a gathering in their honor at the alumni building. A cadet miniature ring or pendant is a nice gift idea for a cadet to give their mother. Since they are expensive it may be a gift for later, after the graduate has worked for a few years. Other scheduled events Friday include instructions and photos of alumni and their graduate son or daughters or grandsons and daughters.
The Summerall Guards perform for the graduating class prior to the final graduation parade. The schedule states that in the case of inclement weather the parade will be canceled. In May of 2011 President Rosa told us the only reason they would cancel the parade was if there was lightning. True to his word, the parade took place in the pouring rain. We were soaked, but happy.
You will want to find a spot across from your cadets company during the parade. At the designated time the seniors are called out of their companies and from the Long Grey Line, standing shoulder to shoulder the length the parade field. They then march toward the review stands and away from their companies. When they reach the other side the graduating seniors turn around and wave to their companies. Be sure to have your cameras, and tissues, handy!
I was warned by a friend whose son graduated a year before mine not to be surprised if my son didn’t spend a lot of time with us. The seniors begin to realize that the closer they get to graduation the closer they get to saying good-bye to their close friends. They have lived for the day when they no longer had to worry about an SMI or a Friday parade, but graduating also means they will never again live with all these good friends again. As an observer throughout the weekend I could see this realization hit the new graduates one by one.
May of 2011 it poured throughout the parade. We were soaked and decided to skip the reception at the president’s home. I’m sure most years it is a lovely event to attend.
Graduation on Saturday is pretty typical of most college graduations. Each cadet is given up to 8 tickets to use. If you need more tickets your cadet is told to resource with friends who may not use the allotment. The Cadet Activities office handles the ticket process. The tickets are assigned to you and can be any where in the field house. I am not sure of the procedure for accessible seating. When in doubt check with the Cadet Activities office directly.
Like the parades when the companies are in alphabetical order, the cadets sit in alphabetical order. Once you spot one or two you know you can then start to narrow down where your cadet is seated. We played a modified game of “Where’s Waldo” to keep my daughter occupied. If you have you ger family members I suggest packing quiet activities like coloring books since the ceremony will last at least 3 hours.
At the very end of the graduation ceremony the president will dismiss the cadets for the last time. Be sure to have your camera ready. The photos with all their covers in the air are really fun!
It helps to have a plan after the ceremony of where you will meet. Many families met on the floor. Others met outside.
General information regarding commencement weekend tickets and handicap access, see the FAQ link above for more information.
Many seniors never want to see their uniforms again. If you want to have it, make sure you let your cadet know prior to graduation week. Many of them leave their uniforms behind. The underclassmen then through the rooms of abandoned clothes and pick up what they will need for the next year.
Rental houses and condos book up quickly. Get yours as soon as you can. We stayed in a hotel and had no trouble getting reservations a few months ahead.
Each company and group of friends have their own traditions at graduation. We were invited to a luncheon by the family of one of our sons friends. I’ve heard of others who rented homes and hosted beach parties.
Dress for the weekend events – See FAQ link above. Most people dress up a little more for the commencement weekend events than for regular parades during the year. Graduation and the Commissioning ceremonies especially. You will see a wide variety of outfits though. The general rule of thumb is to match the uniform of the day for the cadets which for graduation and the parade is their most formal. For the commissioning ceremony, the Lifetime Membership Luncheon and graduation my daughter and I wore dresses and my husband wore a tie. If it is a sunny weekend, you may want to wear a hat with a wide brim to help shield you from the sun during the parade.
My Facebook feed is lighting up with congratulatory notes for the new members of the 2013 Summerall Guards. Cuts Day was yesterday when the 2013 BVA’s were put through their paces. The school usually posts the full list right before Corps Day.
Be sure to make your hotel reservations now for the weekend of March 16-18. The rifle exchange usually happens Saturday morning. Last year the outgoing 2011 Summerall Guards did not do the whole Citadel series before passing their rifles to the 2012 BVA’s, now the 2012 Summerall Guards.
Prior to March 17 be sure to ask your son whether he will be closer to the stands or the chapel side of the field as they march out. That way you will know what side of the field to stand on to take photos. Be sure to meet as many other Summerall Parents as you can so you can share photos and video. Fortunately many of the families post their videos to YouTube.
They host a BBQ lunch that afternoon. You can purchase your Summerall Guards Parent t-shirt at the luncheon. It is a fundraiser for the Summerall Guards to help pay their expenses.
Their first big performance is the Azalea Festival in Wilmington, NC.
I am now bilingual. I speak English and Citadel parent. It took a while to catch on to the new terms, abbreviations and slang terms, but by my son’s sophomore year I was just about fluent.
A number of parents of high school seniors are starting their journey to learn about the 4th Class System. A quick look at the search terms leading to this blog tell me there are a good number of new families seeking information.
I’ll post a few terms here. If you are reading this and are the parent or family member of a cadet, please put the terms you’ve learned over the years. You can purchase a copy of the guide book for knobs called The Guidon, or download it here and read about other terms. The Guidon is updated each year and is available online and in the bookstore in Mark Clark Hall on campus.
Terms:
All in – When all cadets are to be in their room in the barracks.
Black Badge, Red Badge – ROTC pins for cadets who are on an Army or Marine contract.
Brace – a form of attention that knobs must do around any upper class cadet. Try to touch their chin to their spine
Blitz polish or make shine. Brass and shoes can be referred to as being “blitzed out”
Confinements or Cons – punishment for a violation.
Corps Day – a weekend in March to celebrate the founding of the Corps of Cadets.
Division – in the barracks the floors are referred to as divisions, ex. the fourth floor is the 4th division.
El Cid – slang for The Citadel. years ago some cadets cut up a bumper sticker to rearrange the letters. The name stuck.
E.S.P. – Evening Study Period
“Fix your smile” – refers to the band on your cap. Keep it down or else you can see a “Smile” of white between the black bill and the white cap.
FTX – Field Training Exercise, usually a weekend trip with the ROTC program.
Gaudy – a term used when a knob or other cadet acts a bit cocky or outrageous
Guidon – a military flag that designates a company or platoon sized group. Each company has a guidon at The Citadel. The clerk (sophomore cadet officer) carries the guidon during the parades. Knobs don’t touch the guidon. Also the name of the book published each year that Knobs have to memorize.
Knobbie mission – when a senior sends a knob to play a prank, usually on another senior.
Knobbie walk – 120 paces a minute
Ombudsperson or Ombudsman – The officials on campus appointed to investigate concerns. A great resource for parents.
Open and Closed weekends – Open means the upper class cadets can go off campus for the night(s) if they don’t have any tours or confinements. Closed means everyone must be in the barracks at the appointed time each night. You can visit knobs on Open AND Closed weekends. They will not be on campus FTX weekends.
PT – Physical Training
Press and Full Press – The press is the metal dresser with drawers for folded clothes, The full press is the closet for hanging clothes.
Quad – the red and white open area of the barracks. See this link for a panoramic view of 1st Battalion (Murray Barracks)
Sallyport – entry gate to the barracks
SMI – Saturday Morning Inspection
Shirt stays – an elastic band that attaches to the bottom of a uniform shirt and to the top of dress socks. It keeps the shirt in place and the socks pulled up.
Sir sandwich – begin and end all answers to an upperclassmen with sir
Spirit Run – Physical training time that takes place with the knobs and the cadre.
Table top – while bracing the knob leans as far back as possible without wavering making them look like a tabletop
TAC officer (Training Advising and Counseling) the staff person usually active duty or retired officer. Each company and battalion has a TAC officer assigned. One point of contact for parents.
Tours – punishment for a violation. walk the Quad with your rifle for one hour = one tour.